I was in Pune a couple of weeks ago to say goodbye to my last granny. My mom’s mom. Who had lived next door to me for the past 25 years, who was the most alive person I knew, who was no more. The last time I was in Pune in March, I was there to say goodbye to my other granny – my dad’s mom. Who was granny cool, even though you wouldn’t know it to look at her. Why in 2012 life woke up and decided I had an overabundance of grandparents, I cannot say, but as of now, I only have one left.
I am sad, but I am not bitter. dGranny lived a happy and full life. With occasional visits to the hospital, of course, but she didn’t cry wolf too many times. A few months ago her entire brood – 4 children, 8 grandchildren and 3 great grandchildren gathered under one roof. In her own quite way, she went nuts. Wouldn’t stop smiling. That is how I remember her, sitting on the bed in my aunt’s home in Pune, green saree, big smile.
mGranny, who had too many interests in life to ever get bored (reading, music, TV, stitching), had been almost bed ridden for more than two years. Slowly, she gave up one interest after another. 6 months ago she fell down and fractured her leg and was completely confined to her bed. She was so afraid of falling off her bed, she made my mom tie a saree to the window and would lie on the bed all day, holding on to the other end. From carrying around 2 phones by different providers to make sure she could reach people whenever she felt like it, to not even be able to talk on the rare occasion I called, life slowly ebbed out of her.
In both cases the daughters were the primary caregivers, and so i felt, more than ever, the stupidity of the daughters getting sidelined in the A.D rituals, if I may call it that. I hope to live to see the day when common sense will be valued more than rules.
I am sad, but I am not bitter. dGranny lived a happy and full life. With occasional visits to the hospital, of course, but she didn’t cry wolf too many times. A few months ago her entire brood – 4 children, 8 grandchildren and 3 great grandchildren gathered under one roof. In her own quite way, she went nuts. Wouldn’t stop smiling. That is how I remember her, sitting on the bed in my aunt’s home in Pune, green saree, big smile.
mGranny, who had too many interests in life to ever get bored (reading, music, TV, stitching), had been almost bed ridden for more than two years. Slowly, she gave up one interest after another. 6 months ago she fell down and fractured her leg and was completely confined to her bed. She was so afraid of falling off her bed, she made my mom tie a saree to the window and would lie on the bed all day, holding on to the other end. From carrying around 2 phones by different providers to make sure she could reach people whenever she felt like it, to not even be able to talk on the rare occasion I called, life slowly ebbed out of her.
In both cases the daughters were the primary caregivers, and so i felt, more than ever, the stupidity of the daughters getting sidelined in the A.D rituals, if I may call it that. I hope to live to see the day when common sense will be valued more than rules.
2 comments:
Condolences.
And yes, about rules, seriously hell with them!
Thank you for both those things :)
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