Tujhe kya gham teri rishta
Gagan ki baansuri se hain
Pavan ki guftgu se hain
Sooraj ki roshni se hain
They make me want to fly, these words.
Daraaein daraarein hain maathe pe maula
Marramat mukkadar ki kar do maula
Did you see how beautifully he just called Him a mechanic?
Thoda sa resham, tu humdum
thoda sa kurdura
kabhi daud ja ya lad ja
ya khusboo se bhara
Tujhe badalna na chahoon ratti bhar bhi sanam
Bina sajawat, milawat, na jayada na hi kam
I earlier heard bina sajawat as tera sajawat. I liked it better then. Even your imperfections are perfect.
And, zari wala neela aasman. Sigh.
If i can create something that beautiful once, i'll quietly go.
I did briefly fantasize out loud about becoming a writer a couple of days ago. In it i alternate between writing goosebumps-inducing poetry and lol comedies like TBBT. People around me soon bought me back to reality. Didnt exactly help because i then went on to dream about becoming the President of the Unites States.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Conversations, imagined or otherwise
"There is no running away from it, we are all connected" he says."Remember those Venn diagrams we used to draw in school? With the hatched portions where A meets B? Why do you run away from the intersections?"
"The intersections are never me", she says. "A meets me, but its always more A than me. I'm not saying A does it on purpose. But i just make it so easy."
"It doesnt have to be that way, you know? Their lives are as connected to yours as yours are to theirs. Look at the intersections as a means to spreading your influence, to getting what you want while still staying connected. Its not a battleground where only one can survive. Not always."
"I dont know", she says with a confused shake, "its been a while since i've seen the positives of caring or being cared for."
"The intersections are never me", she says. "A meets me, but its always more A than me. I'm not saying A does it on purpose. But i just make it so easy."
"It doesnt have to be that way, you know? Their lives are as connected to yours as yours are to theirs. Look at the intersections as a means to spreading your influence, to getting what you want while still staying connected. Its not a battleground where only one can survive. Not always."
"I dont know", she says with a confused shake, "its been a while since i've seen the positives of caring or being cared for."
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Growth
Seems like just yesterday that i helped that little kid open an email account. Today, he tells me about torrent sites that work better than the ones i frequent. Watching someone grow up is supposed to be bittersweet, but i dont see it in this. (As long as i get my fix of illegal entertainment, i suppose...).
What is bittersweet is first proudly watching parents from another generation brilliantly incorporate the Internet into their everyday lives. From Solitaire to Yahoo Messenger to online share trading to blogs. And then watch them use it to research illnesses that plague them and the ones around them. For a generation that is bought up to see doctors as the last resort, someone you go to with one kidney hanging out, i'm not sure this empowerment will do much good.
What is bittersweet is first proudly watching parents from another generation brilliantly incorporate the Internet into their everyday lives. From Solitaire to Yahoo Messenger to online share trading to blogs. And then watch them use it to research illnesses that plague them and the ones around them. For a generation that is bought up to see doctors as the last resort, someone you go to with one kidney hanging out, i'm not sure this empowerment will do much good.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Coming soon to a multiplex near you
If you live in Maharashtra, that is. Yes, i acted in a move!! My debut film! How cool is that? So what if its a regional one, Maharashtra is a pretty big region. Before i get into the business of crowing about it, here is the scene.
Version 1:
(aka Mahabharata as told through the eyes of the cockroach that lived on kurukshetra grounds)
Atul Kulkarni and some heroine open the glass door and enter the hall, talking. The camera is on them, but doesnt seem particularly interested. It wanders around, taking in the background. And then, it sees me! And two others, walking the perfect walk (okayed in one take, okay?) Torn between staying faithful to the principal characters and following the more interesting ones, the camera totters for a bit. Convention wins, and the camera settles on the principle characters with an audible sigh.
Version 2:
(aka Mahabharta, the official version)
Atul kulkarni and the heroine open the glass door and enter the hall, talking. General people walk around in the background. One of them is me.
I had decided, after the shoot, to be all calm and mature and indifferent about it. But it wasnt much fun. Now i dream of me on the movie poster, me getting my big break because some director watching the movie notices my face in the crowd (a friend put this one in my head, yes, i have friends like that), me in filmfare interviews...
Some highlights (because i'm too bored to join sentences)
- out of the 5 chosen ones, only 1 or 3 were Maharashtrians depending on how you define the term. So the assistant would describe our role (there was a whole lot of describing going on, given that all we had to do was walk) and would not have walked two steps when the one non-Maharashtrian-no-matter-how-you-describe-the-term would pipe up - Kya bole usne? I was sure there would be some MNS types around who'd get us all kicked out, insisting on Marathi crowd in a Marathi film.
- Reliable sources report that the one non-Maharashtrian-no-matter-how-you-describe-the-term is the current favourite for the best debut by a non Marathi actress in a Marathi movie award. Yay! Another party!
Almost forgot. Its Mukti. If we make it to the finals, i will insist you watch.
Version 1:
(aka Mahabharata as told through the eyes of the cockroach that lived on kurukshetra grounds)
Atul Kulkarni and some heroine open the glass door and enter the hall, talking. The camera is on them, but doesnt seem particularly interested. It wanders around, taking in the background. And then, it sees me! And two others, walking the perfect walk (okayed in one take, okay?) Torn between staying faithful to the principal characters and following the more interesting ones, the camera totters for a bit. Convention wins, and the camera settles on the principle characters with an audible sigh.
Version 2:
(aka Mahabharta, the official version)
Atul kulkarni and the heroine open the glass door and enter the hall, talking. General people walk around in the background. One of them is me.
I had decided, after the shoot, to be all calm and mature and indifferent about it. But it wasnt much fun. Now i dream of me on the movie poster, me getting my big break because some director watching the movie notices my face in the crowd (a friend put this one in my head, yes, i have friends like that), me in filmfare interviews...
Some highlights (because i'm too bored to join sentences)
- out of the 5 chosen ones, only 1 or 3 were Maharashtrians depending on how you define the term. So the assistant would describe our role (there was a whole lot of describing going on, given that all we had to do was walk) and would not have walked two steps when the one non-Maharashtrian-no-matter-how-you-describe-the-term would pipe up - Kya bole usne? I was sure there would be some MNS types around who'd get us all kicked out, insisting on Marathi crowd in a Marathi film.
- Reliable sources report that the one non-Maharashtrian-no-matter-how-you-describe-the-term is the current favourite for the best debut by a non Marathi actress in a Marathi movie award. Yay! Another party!
Almost forgot. Its Mukti. If we make it to the finals, i will insist you watch.
Thursday, January 08, 2009
Which version wins?
A teeny tiny funny thing happened yesterday. And since nothing feels really real until i tell my blog about it, here i am. (Which reminds me, i havent yet told you i acted in a movie, have i? It be coming right up!) Only, inspired by people i told it to, my head made up two versions of what happened. I couldnt pick one, so i present to you,
Sunny side up
She leaves at the end of a long, exhausting, not particularly fruitful day, bike keys in one hand and the phone in the other. In the parking lot, she puts the keys in her ear and looks for the opening in the bike where the phone goes in.
And here is where it becomes really inexplicable, she turns the keys.
Dark matter
She leaves at the end of a long, exhausting, not particularly fruitful day, bike keys in one hand and the phone in the other. In the parking lot, she puts the keys to her ear and looks for an opening in the bike where the phone can be inserted. She turns the keys in her ear, hoping she wont have to resort to kick starting. She tries the key a few times, but it seems stuck. She tries jamming it in. There is blood, but it doesnt quite register. She is just trying to start the bike, why would there be blood? She falls over, wondering where all the pain is coming from. Just as she passes out, the phone begins to ring...
Sunny side up
She leaves at the end of a long, exhausting, not particularly fruitful day, bike keys in one hand and the phone in the other. In the parking lot, she puts the keys in her ear and looks for the opening in the bike where the phone goes in.
And here is where it becomes really inexplicable, she turns the keys.
Dark matter
She leaves at the end of a long, exhausting, not particularly fruitful day, bike keys in one hand and the phone in the other. In the parking lot, she puts the keys to her ear and looks for an opening in the bike where the phone can be inserted. She turns the keys in her ear, hoping she wont have to resort to kick starting. She tries the key a few times, but it seems stuck. She tries jamming it in. There is blood, but it doesnt quite register. She is just trying to start the bike, why would there be blood? She falls over, wondering where all the pain is coming from. Just as she passes out, the phone begins to ring...
Saturday, January 03, 2009
Happy new year and other nonsense
One glimpse of your own mortality is all it takes to stop making fun of the old.
No, that wasnt about death. But about empathy. So from today, i'll stop with the jokes. At least for today. I dont think i can control what comes out of my mouth very well any more. Strange, i always saw myself as one of the quieter ones, as one who had to make efforts to speak, not make efforts to shut up.
More such discoveries about myself are leading me to believe that i havent been stress tested enough. While my behaviour during normal times is well defined, there is no saying where the bugs will come out from once you bring on the stress.
Happy new year was celebrated with the discovery of not a bug in my code, but a monster.
No, that wasnt about death. But about empathy. So from today, i'll stop with the jokes. At least for today. I dont think i can control what comes out of my mouth very well any more. Strange, i always saw myself as one of the quieter ones, as one who had to make efforts to speak, not make efforts to shut up.
More such discoveries about myself are leading me to believe that i havent been stress tested enough. While my behaviour during normal times is well defined, there is no saying where the bugs will come out from once you bring on the stress.
Happy new year was celebrated with the discovery of not a bug in my code, but a monster.
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