Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Psychohistory doesn't seem all that impractical, especially when one studies the behaviour of people faced with the prospect of a trip. The first reaction is always an enthusiastic "I-can't-wait-to-get-away". It is when you start discussing the time, the place and in some cases, the money, that reality sets in. The sheer quantity and creativity of excuses I've heard in the past weeks would have staggered me, if I hadn't heard them all before. Having been party to around 7 trips over the last couple of years, I now know the whole process by heart. What follows is the prologue of the trips of a specific group. It can be very easily generalized, as anyone who has ever planned a trip will readily agree.
It always begins with a "Hey, lets go for a trip". To which there is always a general agreement. The when is agreed upon surprisingly fast, the options being restricted to weekends. And then someone pops the question - "Where"? Which is always answered by "the expert" (which I think is a very good thing. One, he knows what he is talking about. And two, ten people talking about a trip invariably come up with twenty suggestions). The expert of course doesn't answer right away, but first demands the facts of the case. And the most pertinent, weirdly enough, is how many people. And thus begins one of the most vexing chicken-and-egg problems in history. A sample conversation that a recruiter has with a prospective candidate invariably takes the following course:

R: Hi! We're planning to go for a trip somewhere next weekend
PC: That's great! Where are you planning to go?
R: *silently cursing the PC for asking the unanswerable* Err.. we haven't quite decided on that yet.
PC: (growing apprehensive about spending his weekend in the company of people with such exceptional decision making capabilities) How can I answer without knowing where we are going?
R: Of course you're right. But can you at least give me a tentative yes? You are free that weekend, right?
Wise PC: Oh no! I suddenly remembered I'm going home that weekend. Sorry!
Desperate PC: Oh no! I suddenly remembered I'm getting married that weekend. Pity you can't make it! *Poof!*
Unwise PC: Yes, I think so.

And thus a very approximate number reaches the expert, who then proceeds to include it in his calculations. A list of prospective locations with pros and cons is sent out. Calculations have to be frequently redone as the variables fluctuate. 3 days to go for D-day and all we have is a very confident expert and no destination. 2 days to go and the expert finally breaks his silence. He names a place that the majority accept with relief and gratitude. The minority is asked to shutup or get out.
If you think that's all there is to it, you've obviously never been a part of this before. All throughout the negotiations, there are *concerns* to be addressed. Concerns about the capability of the drivers, the availability of food, the range of various mobile service providers, the accommodation, the weather... Even after all of them have been addressed to the satisfaction of the candidates and their parents, there are the inevitable dropouts. Client interviews, deadlines, visiting friends, mood swings, academic registrations... I've heard them all. But we always end up with enough people to fill the expert's maruti 800.
However painful the prologue, the story always makes it worth all the headache!

8 comments:

Arjun Karande said...

Do I know what you mean... I haven't met a single person who has regretted a trip after being coaxed, begged or gun-pointed to it. But yet they bicker!

Can't we just get off our [bleep]s and just wander once in a while? Have we become that old already, that it matters whether we manage a 30 seater or a 40 seater when there are just 25 people?

The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind, but they're all locked up in their rooms and will never get a flavour of it, now will they?

vinaya said...

And do i share your frustration!
I'm willing to forget as long as those locked souls dont stop us from getting out.
We've done all we can. Its now time for us to live and the others to continue to exist.

Pooja said...

Brings back a 100 memories!

When you coming, we have our biannual dinner and trip remember ? ;)

vinaya said...

How can i forget! The time of the year that your mom dreads most :P

Anonymous said...

(I am stalking your blog and spamming it too)
One Sunday I remember spending 7 hours of my precious weekly off on helping prepare dinner for you guys
*grrrrr*

In other news, we had an impromptu outing yesterday, left my office at 4, (had some admin related work at BG), and out there we decided to go to have cold coffee, Needless to say, I never got back to office :)

~Pooja

vinaya said...

Oh yes, the aamras! You'd better hope i dont get too nostalgic. I'm going halfway home this weekend. I might just decide to pop in!
Impromptu outings are the best!

Arjun Karande said...

Correction, Kaushik...

We have less than 1 year :({

vinaya said...

Kaushik: Argeed! I have learn to let go a little after coming here.

Arjun: Yes :(( It'll be terrible having to leave this place.
PhD anyone? :P

 
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