Golden rule #1
(For those trying to decide whether something in their life is worth keeping)

If you're going to miss the fact that you had it more that you're going to miss it, you're better off without it.

Lost a ear ring yesterday. This is how I'm trying to console myself. Not really working :(

Random musings

Hmm, another presentation. Thank God ours is over! Now I can listen to what the others say. He's supposed to be really chaapu, hope he says something that I can understand... oh noooo, not about probability. I'll switch off :(( Oh come on, don't be such a child. 12th standard kids are not as afraid of probability. You've at least got to try. Hmm, so far so good... What are they fighting over like this? Is it possible that i've understood and they haven't?? Uh ho, I'm lost. Well, what else did I expect? God, I'm hungry! Look around... has anyone got money along? Whom can I sponge off for a treat? Is he going to talk about probability throughout? Been ages since I went for swimming. I might just be able to make it today... if only they stop fighting. Its actually quite nice in here. Thank God the department has AC! Imagine having to do this in a hot stuffy room. Can the heat really get worse? The sun will have to come down to Kanpur for that. I've been hearing only one voice for some time now. Ooh, they've stopped fighting! Yeees! Ooh, one of the fighters has dozed off! Wish I could do that too... Haven't blogged in ages. Wonder what I can write about... why doesn't something interesting happen in my life? Hmm, maybe I could write about... Why does he keep disturbing my thoughts? Can't he speak a little softer? Wonder what he was thinking about during my presentation? I hope it was something very interesting and I hope I thoroughly bugged him. Actually, he's not bad. But why does he have to talk about probability? And why do they have to hang the stupid clock at the back of the class? God knows the listeners need it more than the speakers! Wish I had eyes at the back of my head... Hey, eveyone is getting up. Hurrah!! The end!

"It can't be done without you."
"How can you say no?"
"Pleaseeeeeeeeee"

And of course I fall for it. Every time. Go against my instincts, my wishes, go thinking I'm doing someone a big favour, go thinking I'm going to save the world and end up finding out that the world didn't really need any saving. And even if it did, there were others much better equipped to save it.
No one ever makes me the scapegoat. I stick my neck out and volunteer.

Some people never learn.

(I know some of you might read this, please don't take it the wrong way. I know you thought the world needed saving too.)

A big day in the history of me

I've been crying, cribbing, pining, dreaming about my own pair of speakers even since I got here. Of course that's not all I did. I'm surprisingly active when it comes to such things. If all the people I unsuccessfully tried to sponge, beg, bulldoze into gifting me one ever turn up with speakers, I can supply speakers to a whole wholesale market! Friends, relatives, friends friends, friends relatives...
Cut to the present. The near present actually. My parents come to visit me and tell me in very clear words to stop all this nonsense and go buy one for me myself. And the good little child that I am, I obey! And they there are - two tiny bundles of joy. Small, black, unpretentious, you hardly notice them until they start talking. And then, you shutup and listen!
I've had headphones for sometime now, but with speakers its totally different. With headphones, the song is a part of you. Its like listening to yourself sing a beautiful song. For those like me who find the very idea impossible, imagine you sing like lata or rafi. Though its wonderful, sometimes you just want to be an audience. To be able to listen when you want to and switch off when you don't. And that is why I LOVE my speakers. And my parents, for making me do this.

Sour grapes?

I see people work. I see them put in days and nights. I see them at 2 in the morning, fighting against time, against sleep to meet the deadline, a hundred thousand dollars hanging in the balance. And I say to myself - thank god I'm working only for a grade.

I see people playing for their country. I see their every stroke analyzed, every move commented upon. I see them being deified with every win and written off with every defeat. And I say to myself - thank god I only play for fun.

I see people in public life. I see their every word being heard, every mannerism being imitated, every mistake being recorded. I see them having to live up to images they haven't created. And I say to myself - thank god, my life is my own.

I see people. I see them staking everything on their ideas, their beliefs, their passions. I see them flying with the highs and sinking in the lows. I see them drunk on achievement, I see them drunk in sorrow. And I say to myself - thank god I never lived?